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 The Garden State

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TomL
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Join date : 2010-03-25
Age : 61
Location : Lebanon, PA

PostSubject: The Garden State   Mon Jun 02, 2014 7:22 am

THE GARDEN STATE

God and Satan were watching a football game. God was rooting for the Angels, while Satan was rooting for the Demons. At half time, God decided to create the physical universe. God took the head coach for the Angels and put him in the Garden State and called him Adam. But Adam was all alone, so God gave him a cheerleader named Eve.

Now, Satan was upset with God because no demon was made a part of God's plans. So, Satan went down to earth and talked with the cheerleader named Eve and gave her a new cheer. "Here Adam, eat it. Here Adam, eat it..." So Adam ate, and saw that the cheerleader was naked. And Adam sang, "She looks like an angel, talks like an angel...... but, she's the devil in disguise."

Then they heard God in the Garden State, and they quickly put some maple leaves on. And God asked, "what happened?" Adam said, "The cheerleader you gave me cheered me on to eat, and I ate." Then God asked Eve, "what have you done?" And Eve said, "Well, this guy wearing a Demons jersey taught me a new cheer."

So, God told Satan, "Because of what you did, you will no longer be able to watch football with me. You will no longer eat from table. You will crawl on the ground and eat dirt."

To the cheerleader he said, "You will no longer cheer to Adam, but nag him all the days his life. Yet he shall be your boss, and you will give him many children, even though it will be painful."

"Adam, what shall I do with you," God said. "By the way, did you know I own the Angels. You are fired as head coach. You must leave the Garden State with your wife who will no longer cheer you but nag at you all the days of your life. Yet you must love her unconditionally. And you will scratch out a meager existence as garbage man in New Jersey."

As parting gifts, God gave Adam and Eve some Ram skins to wear. In New Jersey, Eve began nagging Adam about changing the name of the State. Adam said, "I'm not listening to you. Me listening to you is what got us in this mess called New Jersey." Eve replied, "Then let's at least give it a nickname." Adam said, "Well, alright. What will the nickname be?" Eve answered, "Garden State."

And that is how New Jersey became known as the Garden State.

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study - Do your best to present yourself to God as an approved worker who has nothing to be ashamed of, handling the word of truth with precision. - 2 Timothy 2.15; ISV, isv.com
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